Securite-Securite-Securite...

First, three more terms needed to be added to our glossary of nautical terms.  These are emegency distress calls used on VHF Channel 16 for all mariners.

Mayday- is used to indicate the the vessel or persons on board are threatened by grave and imminent danger and request immediate assistance.

Pan-pan- is the urgency signal used when the safety of the ship or person is in jeopardy.

Securite- (pronounced "Saycuritay") is used for safety or navigation messages or important weather warnings.

OK, now we can proceed:

SECURITE-SECURITE-SECURITE-HELLO ALL STATIONS, THIS IS THE VESSEL ONCE AROUND AT LIBERTY ISLAND MARINA IN NEW YORK CITY-BREAK-

WE INTERRUPT OUR NORMALLY SCHEDULED BLOGGING TO ANNOUNCE THAT THE MATTRESS HAS BEEN DELIVERD-REPEAT-THE MATTRESS HAS BEEN DELIVERED-BREAK-

THE PREVIOUS PAN-PAN AND MAYDAY MESSAGES ARE HEREBY CANCELLED.  MRS. HOWELL AND THIRSTEN WERE SEEN HEADED FOR A NAP AT 2:00 PM EASTERN STANDARD TIME, SHORTLY AFTER DELIVERY-BREAK-

THERE IS NO TRUTH TO THE RUMOR THAT THE BOAT'S ROCKING HAD ANYTHING TO DO WITH THE NAP...IT WAS CAUSED BY LOCAL WATER TAXI TRAFFIC IN THE HARBOR-BREAK-

NO PHOTOS OF THIS OPERATION WILL BE RELEASED-BREAK

ONCE AROUND-OUT