The Motor Vessel "Once Around"

The Motor Vessel "Once Around"
The Motor Vessel "Once Around" in the Florida Keys

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Venus, Mars and the Un-Answerable Question

This has nothing to do with boats.  I had debated even writing it, but when the subject came up yet again this morning, I knew I must.

As you know last weekend we spent a few days in The Big Easy with our RAT friends.  One afternoon a group of us stopped for a cocktail around 5PM, and then returned to our hotel to rest and clean up for dinner.  I took the usual 15 minutes to shower and throw on a pair of chinos and a rumpled looking linen shirt and settled in comfortably to wait for my lovely bride.  I was pretty mellow and in no rush.  Translated:  My defenses were down.

Earlier that day Carrie had purchased a pair of open toed sandals that quite frankly weren't her style.  She was trying to find anything that would look somewhat nicer than the clog looking shoes she had been wearing to protect her broken big toe.  I told her at the time I thought she was crazy to risk someone stepping on her toe, but...

I think I dozed off waiting for her to shower and get ready.  As she walked through the door into the sitting area of our room, I was surprized to see that she had on a very sexy fitted dress along with the aforementioned sandals (which took away from the otherwise great look of the dress).  She asks me, "Does this dress look allright?" 

Now we have been happily married for two and a half decades, and that didn't happen by me being an idiot...well, not often at least.  Every married guy worth his salt should have recognized that she has asked a very deftly disguised version of, "Is this dress too tight", or the real root best never answered question, "Does this dress make my butt look big?"   However, after one martini and a snooze, I was not at my sharpest and responded, "You are dressed much nicer than I am, and I am pretty sure everyone else is dressing pretty casual tonight, too".  She responds, "You think it looks too tight, huh?"  I knew I was in trouble, but dug the hole a little deeper by saying honestly, "It does look a little tighter than what you normally wear, but it looks gr..."  Game over, she spins on her heels and heads back into the bedroom to change.  I quietly leave to join my friends at the bar downstairs, knowing this is not going to end well.  I had started out not wanting to tell her the shoes didn't do justice to her dress, and I had ended up making her think she looked bad in it.  Great!  What a moron I was!  I would probably never again see her in that sexy dress.  Worse, I might have really hurt her feelings.  Why do women ask those dumb questions anyway?

A few minutes later Carrie joins us looking great in a pair of designer jeans and a low cut blouse.  As often happens when she enters from across the room, she takes my breath away, and I break into a great big open smile having completely forgotten that she might be upset over the dress incident.  It is a good thing my smile was genuine, too, because if she thought for a moment my it was just a way to make up to her, she would have my head in a basket.  She half-jokingly reminds me of the dress discussion, but doesn't seem to be holding a grudge.

Then, this morning, three days later as she is unpacking she comes accross the dress.  Walking to her closet I hear her mumble something about taking it back to Nordstrom, or wherever.  I know this is not over...

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